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Introducing....JM Fanatics Awards

MOST FUNNY SCENE NOMINEE

 

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TENDER TRIUMPH

KATIE’S FATHER: Are you aware, Mr. Galverra, that Katie has been to a farm only once in her entire life? I happen to recall the even very vividly. Do you want to tell him about it, Katherine, or shall I?

KATIE: Dad, I was only twelve years old!

RYAN CONNELLY: So were your friends, Katherine. But they didn’t scream when the farmer wrung the chicken’s neck. They didn’t call him a murderer at his own table and refuse to eat chicken for two year. They didn’t find the horses smelly; the process of milking a cow ‘gross’; and a multimillion-dollar farm ‘a great big stinking place filled with filthy animals.’

KATIE: Well, they didn’t happen to fall into a pile of manure, get bitten by a goose, or kicked by a blind horse either!

RYAN: You’re laughing now, Galverra, but you won’t be laughing when you discover that Katie’s idea of living within a strict budget is spending everything she makes and charging anything else she wants to my account. She cant cook anything that doesn’t come in a bag, box or can; she doesn’t know which end of a needle to thread; she—

KATIE’S MOTHER: Ryan, you are exaggerating! Katie has lived on her own income since the day she graduated fro college, and she does know how to sew.

RYAN: She does petitpoint or some damn thing like that. And not well! I still don’t know whether that thing she did for us is supposed to be fish or an owl, and neither do you!

KATIE (laughing): It’s a mushroom. I made it when I was fourteen.

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